Excuse me while I find you something else
And somewhere else to occupy yourself.
The truth is, that cheesecake doesn’t need you
In its personal space at the moment.
Now let’s just move right along. Move along.
Go on with you now. Yes. You. I’m talking
To you. No one else. That “innocent” look
Has nobody fooled. You’re fooling no one.
And I’m not trying to be mean. You know
That you won’t resist temptation alone.
Cheesecake conquers self control faster than
Hot-blooded Americans realize,
Especially if mealtime was more than-
Er — a minute or two ago. You want
Some for yourself and you might as well tell
Everyone, including yourself, the truth.
Come away with me before you fall to
Agonizing depths of diet failure.
Kindly leave the table, then stay away.
Enjoy a nice big slice of self-control!
November 27, 2019
for my German Shepherd, “Roosevelt”, who has expressed no overwhelming disdain for all desserts
Native of all my loveliest daydreams,
Expected to jolt to life anytime
We are together. She’s more than she seems:
Perfect for young and old, inspiring rhyme
Even doing nothing at all. This sweet
Triceratops is plush and whimsical,
Delighting me, and awakening dreams
I cherish of Eden’s peace. Optimal
New friend of kids who into wonder roam.
Options for her employment are many:
Sunblock sitting on my shoulder while my
Awesome husband cheerfully drives us home.
Unexpected friend of silly granny,
Reaching for her, since she is so close by.
October 15, 2019
Should I hoard up all my umbrage,
Lest it into trouble stray?
What if umbrage is a substance
Whose quick exit brings dismay?
Can I really guard and keep it
And protect it from all harm,
Or will umbrage be escaping
On a smoothly-twisting arm?
Might I keep it in a closet?
Should I stash it in a bank?
Would my umbrage
If I hide it in a tank?
Well, no matter where I put it,
It is sure to get away,
Since we hear of many people
Taking umbrage ev’ry day!
September 27, 2019