Must I forgive again? Again?
And suffer through another’s sin?
The sins I find in me feel small,
Requiring not much grace at all.
But this new wound so bleeds and smarts,
I want revenge on evil hearts.
Is there not, Lord, another way
That I might follow You today?
Through joy, applause, and endless fun—
Could not Your will in this be done?
Forgiving other’s cruelty
Seems wrong and so unfair to me!
Thus, I compile my ugly sin,
As God forgives again. Again.
November 13, 2017
for my sister, Shawn,
who has been praying fervently through the morning for me to forgive the egregious, sometimes dangerous,
sins of strangers
Colossians 3:13 NIV “…if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
I am ashamed to have been able to write a poem like this because the emotional struggles expressed therein seem so immature, even to me. As my sister was praying for me, I pondered how western Christians generally walk with Jesus. I expect that most Eastern Christians, many of whom are suffering persecution, may be walking close enough to Jesus to have left this kind of emotional immaturity far behind them. If this is not the case, I would be surprised. Though, really, I shouldn’t be surprised by any sin. But this is not something to hang on to. The bottom line is that I need to get closer to Jesus.
Pray for me?